part one

I’m so angry right now

I don’t know I don’t know I honestly don’t know

I have killed myself for so long

I separated my soul from my body

Since I was killing my soul, I needed to kill my body too

I hated who I was

Hated

HATED

I couldn’t stand myself

Can I stand my self now?

Should I stand myself now?

Will I stand myself now?

I don’t know

I don’t know

I need to fill myself up

Why do I keep tearing myself down

Why can’t I fill myself up

I need to fill myself up

I tore apart my soul

I tore it apart

Why

Why could I take my own soul and break it

I hurt my body to hurt my soul

I hurt my body to hurt my soul

I hurt my body to break my soul

I hurt my body to kill my soul

The things that I have told myself

I would never imagine saying to anyone else

The things I have told myself have killed me

Killed me

Not physically though

Not physically though

Not physically though

Only emotionally

The anger I have in my soul is burning as bright as fireworks

Fireworks of fits

Fireworks of blowups

Fireworks of hate

When I am experiencing these fireworks

The only thing I can do is go with them

I have to trust myself to go with the flow

Sometimes it doesn’t work out

Anger is a surface level emotion

There is always something deeper going on

Sadness, hurt, neglect, fear

Disappointment

What can I do with those feelings?