"I just got my bag of sharps back. I have like 6 razors. I
want to take one apart. I want to go back into my room. I want to go get it
right now. It’s the only thing I can think about. I don’t want to breathe; I
don’t want to do anything but take it apart.
I want to take it apart. I want to take it apart. I want to
take it apart. I want to take it apart. I want to take it apart. I want to take
it apart. I want to take it apart. I want to take it apart. I want to take it
apart. I want to take it apart. I want to take it apart. I want to take it
apart. I want to take it apart. I want to take it apart.
I want to take it apart. I want to take it apart. I want to
take it apart. I want to take it apart. I want to take it apart. I want to take
it apart.
Should I? Should I? Should I? Should I? Should I? Should I?
Should I?
Could I? Could I? Could I? Could I? Could I? Could I? Could
I? Could I?
Would I actually do it?
Would I actually do it?
Would I actually do it?
Would I actually do it?
What would happen if I did? What would happen if I did? What
would happen if I did? What would happen if I did?
People would be mad. Sad. Hurt. Upset. Disappointed. People
would be so disappointed in me. I would let so many people down. I would let so
many people down. I would let so many people down. I would let so many people
down.
I would lose so much trust. But it would be worth it? I
would feel so great after doing it. I would feel so great after doing it. I
would feel so great after doing it. I would feel so great after doing it. I
would feel so great after doing it. I would feel so great after doing it. But I would hurt so many people. If I did
that again I would hurt so many people. I don’t want to hurt so many people. I
don’t want to hurt so many people. I don’t want to hurt so many people. I don’t
want to hurt so many people.
I want someone to be proud of me. I want someone to be proud
of me. I want someone to be proud of me. Is that possible? Would they be proud
if I took it apart? Would they be proud if I didn’t take it apart? Would they
be proud if I cut? Would they be proud if I didn’t cut?
I don’t know what I should do. I think I’ll be okay. But
it’s still there. What am I going to do when I come face to face with it again?
I have to have a plan. I have to have a plan. I have to have a plan. I have to
have a plan. I have to have a plan. I have to have a plan. I have to have a
plan. I have to have a plan. I have to have a plan. I have to have a plan. I
have to have a plan. I have to have a plan.
What is my plan? How am I going to look at the razors,
finger nail clippers, safety pins, push pins, pop tabs, and everything else in
there without instantly taking it and cutting?
My plan. What is my plan? Okay. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
1.
You are going to leave the bag alone for
tonight.
2.
Take your meds, YOUR PRESCRIBED AMOUNT, and go
to bed.
3.
Wake up in the morning, go to class, come back
from class and start to put things from the bag away.
a.
If you become impulsive during that time period,
step outside of your room or go to the bathroom or take a walk around the
floor, then take a deep breath, or take ten deep breaths, walk back in and
continue to put things away.
b.
If you are still impulsive, go to the lounge and
walk yourself through an impulse control log, and try again later.
4.
After stats everything should be put away, if it
is not, finish up then.
a.
Again, if impulses arise continue steps stated
above (3a&3b)
b.
If it gets to the point where you are going to
take something apart without a doubt call someone
i. Don’t
bother any of your friends
1.
Don’t do it
ii. Call
the counseling center and talk through with a counselor
1.
319-273-2676
5.
If at all you start to get impulsive with the
objects being in the room, follow your regular safety plan.
Jules you can do this, don't doubt yourself, you are strong. You can do this. You can do this. You can do this."
No comments:
Post a Comment